Friday, January 18, 2008

The Joker Cop. Chapter-3

That evening Charley Master got back in his village at five and went straight to a second rate village bar.

Inside the bar room he set in for a drink among a bunch of illiterate village flocks,his usual 'glass mates', and called for whisky.

The drink was served, and after a few glasses,Charley Master began to talk big things about himself to his glass mates- That he was the sweet heart of the college girls, that he was a man loaded with courage, that his wife was terribly scared of him, and so on. All lies and gas! But the illiterate village flock listened intently wondering-'Wow! What a super man!'

Charley Master continued in the bar for an hour more amusing every one around.Now it was time for him to go home.He then drew the last swallow of whisky from his glass,and getting to his feet said grinning to everyone around,"Well friends,we'll meet again tomorrow." Then he paced near the counter, payed the bill,and and let himself out of the bar.

He paused for a moment at the bar gate to light a cigarette, and then made his way along the country road to his house quarter of a mile away.

But after going half the way,Charley Master suddenly remembered something with a chill that he had clean forgotten all day long.That morning his wife Sefy had reminded him for the third time to bring her a new bra by that evening,But after reaching the police station, everything about the bra had gone out of his brain, and now standing by the road side he began to sweat and shiver over the problem.

As per the nature of Sheffy, if she finds that he had returned home empty handed,she would most likely jump upon him like an angry chimp. There was no doubt about it.So something had to be done very fast.There ware no cloth shops in the village,and moreover,there was no time to go back to town at that hour to buy a bra.

Now standing there all alone,Charley Master tried to figure out the situation and find a way to solve this head ache.He stood scratching his head for minutes and at last stumbled upon something that seemed very practical and funny.
Leaving the road, Charley Master turned into a side road on his left and hurried on.Half an hour later, he turned into the front yard of a brick built house, and walking near the house, he climbed a flight of wooded steps that led up to the porch and knocked on the door panel.

There was a brief silence, and then the door clicked open and a women appeared in the doorway.Though middle aged, she was indeed beautiful with a set of black, restless eyes.

On seeing Charley Master, her eyes lit up and a flirtatious smile appeared on her face.

" Hallo, Charley!" She said jovially, "Nice to see you again.Please come in"

That was Cathy, who was known in the village as 'Captian Cathy', Charley Master's old girl friend.

She ushered him into the sitting room, and at once Charley Master sat down heavily into a sofa.Cathy settled down beside him.

"Are things going well enough Charley?" She asked smiling, Her eyes probing him.

"No, I've got into a terrible problem." Charley Master said with a note of urgency in his voice," I need your help"

"Oh!,What's your problem?Tell me about it" Cathy said with with an expression flirtatious surprise and leaned close to him, Is your wife going to chop off your balls?"
But for Charley Master,it was not the time to flirt with her,.

"It's something serious Cathy" He said looking into her eyes.Her whole attitude seemed very friendly, and encouraging, and then, without any hesitation,Charley Master gave her a quick run-down on his ' bra problem. '

The whole thing was a big joke for Cathy.

"Good grief!" She exclaimed laughing aloud and clapped him on the shoulder.

"Sheffy is a real monster." She said,"If you go home without her bra,She'll have your balls. But any way, tell me about my job in this nuisance."

"I want a bra that will fit Sheffy." Charley Master said,"And in return I"ii bring you two new bras as a reward."

"Great!" Cathy exclaimed,"How could I refuse Such a wonderful offer?Anyway, you are lucky that I"ve got a new bra that'll fit your wife and I'll give you that.But you should keep your promise."

"Don't have any doubts about it Cathy" Charley Master said excitedly,'By tomorrow evening two new bras will be here for you."

Satisfied,Cathy got to her feet and crossed into her bed room, closing the door behind her.

But there was another problem. About one week back,there had been a spat between the two over some trifles and since then Cathy had been waiting for a chance to settle the score.Now it was her wonderful opportunity and she decided to make it as funny festival.

End of chapter three.Chapter four will be up within a couple of days.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

THE JOKER COP-chapter 2

One day Inspector Eddy along with a team of his best five constables had gone somewhere in the town to investigate a very serious case.

Earlier that day Charley Master had tried his every trick to get into the team.But all his tricks had been foiled by the Inspector who knew that if Charley Master was taken into the team, he would mess up every thing by sticking his nose into everything.

But the impression of Charley Master was different. 'The stupid Inspector is scared of my abilities.He thought smugly, 'He knows I'll crack the case in five minutes.That's why the fool was afraid to take me into his team.'

Now, inside the resting room of the police station,free from the regular rebukes of the Inspector, Charley Master lolled in an old easy chair with his eyes closed and a smouldering cigarette held between his lips.He had been drifting away in a sweet day dream for the past thirty minutes.

That was the nature of Charley Master.Whenever he was free and alone, he would dream away his time by thinking about himself as the hero of several acts of bravery such as fighting with a rhino, wrestling with King Kong, smashing down a bunch of crocks and so on.Now in his present dream, Charley Master imagined himself as the Inspector of the police station.There, donning the imposing uniform of the Inspector, he sat sternly behind a large desk and glared at the stupid constable in front of him.The constable was being punished for some serious mistake and he was shaking like a frightened rat.

Then suddenly 'Inspector Charley Master' barked an order."Squat.....get your ass on the ground!"
"Yes sir" The constable yelled,squatting down on the ground.
"Get up"
"Yes sir" The constable jumped to his feet.
"Squat again"
"Yes sir" dropped down again.
"On your feet"
"Yes sir"
And it went on.'up....down....up....down....up....down.' The poor Constable was forced to squat in and out until he slumped down onto the ground, dog tired.

But who was 'constable' any way?It was the funniest thing about it.It was non other than the real Inspector Eddy himself ! In Charley Master's wild day dream,Inspector Eddy had been stripped of all his ranks and had been reduced to the position of a poor constable.On the other hand,Charley master had been promoted as the new, fearsome Inspector of the police station!
The deplorable condition of 'Constable Eddy', though it was only a day dream,was a big joke for Charley Master and he laughed out aloud in a dog barking like sound.

"Hou....Hou....Hou....Hoooo......." He howled with laughter.But not for long.Suddenly his laughter was cut off in the midway by a thunderous roar that exploded right at his back.
Startled, Charley Master sprang out of his chair, turned round, and stared in disbelief right into the face of Inspector Eddy who was fuming with fury.

Frightened by the sudden appearance of the Inspector,Charley Master lost his levelheadedness and in that confusion began to give him non stop salutes.One..two..three..four..It went on.
This act of buffoonery maddened the Inspector."Stop it"He exploded,"You are on duty now.Aren't you?"
"Yes sir" Gulped Charley Master.
"Then what in the hell is the reason for your horse laugh I heard? What's eating you?Thinking about a second marriage?"
"No sir."Blabbered Charley Master."I've had enough from my old girl."
On hearing it, the cops around doubled with laughter.

But things would not have ended there.But right at that moment twp constables hustled the most wanted thug in the town into the station.The thug was violent and he was grappling with his captors.

On seeing the thug, the Inspector and the and the police men darted towards him to seize him.But just before they reached there, the thug somehow wriggled himself free from the police men and bolted out of the station with the cops at his heels.

In the heat of the moment, Charley Master and his comics were forgotten by every one and it eventually saved him from the possible repercussions from the Inspector for laughing aloud in an indecent way inside the police station.

End of chapter two.Chapter three will be up within a couple of days.

THE JOKER COP-chapter 1

Unless the Lord builds the house
Builders labour in vain
Unless the Lord watches over the city
The watchmen stand guard in vain Psalms 127/2-3

All glory to Lord Jesus Christ who has blessed me with the talent of writing !

This story is a fiction.All characters are fictional.Please make your comments,opinions and criticism about the story on this blog.Re production of this story or portion there of in any form may be with the permission of the author.

The Story begins!

Chapter one

Charley Master was a police constable as well as a born joker.He was a slender,sunburned man in his mid fourtees with a jovial face,a straight nose,black tousled hair,a straggly mustache,and black restless eyes.

His real name was Charley Joseph and Charley Master was his nick name.The nickname had been given by Alfy,a petty thief who strongly believed that Charley Master was not only a joker but also the 'Master of all the International Jokers'.
The family of Charley Master consisted of his niggling, big built, and hippo looking wife Sheffy and his two children.Sheffy was a real monster who was angry about everything ,and as a matter of fact Charley Master was afraid of her though he never admitted it openly.But fact was that, Charley Master wouldn'nt even dare to take a leak if its permission had been denied by her.
One day,Charley Master was out and about in the town on the lookout for the troublesome teen aged bikers in the town.There had beeen many complaints against many of them for racing against each other at breakneck speed along the busy roads and lanes in the town.

After getting on duty, Charley master went about in the town posing like a super cop, and also sometimes sneaking in the rear of the good looking women flock to enjoy the undulations of their ass.

Later,while he was sticking around in front of the womens college, he saw a bike roaring down the road, its rider hunching over the handle bar.Immediately he stepped out on to the road and waved at the rider to stop the bike .The bike screeched to a halt near Charley Master, and the rider after removing his sun glass, flashed a wide smile.

Charley Master looked him over with interest.The guy was a Micahel Jackson looking type, sporting a goldring in his left ear.
"Hello sir, What's the problem sir?" He grinned in Jackson style.
"Well,Cycle Jackson,"Charley Master began, trying to sound tough, "Show me your driving licence"
"Sorry Sir" Jackson shrugged ."I don't have a license sir"
"No license!" Exclaimed Charley Master, his face set and angry. "Very well, then you are going to be in big trouble.Tell me your name and address."
He demanded at Cycle Jackson and took out a paper and pen from his pocket.
"I'm Wise Wilson sir" The rider answered without any hesitation.

Charley Master was about to start writing, but right at that moment a buxom lady showed up.Jerking her hips and jiggling her bust she came swaggering along the side walk and on seeing her, forgetting everything every thing about 'cycle Jackson', Charley Master began to watch her in fascination with a wide foolish grin.
He stood looking at her until she disappeared at a distance, and then, on realizing his 'mistake', swung his head around to find the biker.But he had already vanished from the place.

While Charley Master had been keenly watching the lady,' Cycle Jackson ' had made a clean getaway by pushing his bike to a safe distance and then starting off in haste.

End of the first chapterThe 2nd chapter will be up within a couple of days